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Valentine’s Day can provoke a mix of emotions, from excitement to stress. If you're one of those feeling less than thrilled about the holiday, you're not alone. Here’s how to navigate the day without letting mismatched expectations cause tension in your relationship.
February 14th—whether you love it or not—comes with all sorts of pressure. We’re surrounded by stuffed animals, heart-shaped balloons, and chocolates, constant reminders of a day that’s as commercial as it is romantic. For some, it's a time to celebrate love, while for others, it’s just another day. The trickiest part? Managing the different views and expectations that can often arise in relationships.
What are your feelings about it? And your partner’s?
As a couples counselor, I’ve seen how people’s approach to the holiday can vary widely. Some love Valentine’s Day, while others may even hate it.
The hidden expectations often lead to misunderstandings. To avoid hurting your partner’s feelings, it’s important to openly discuss what makes you feel loved and appreciated. Talking about these desires—whether it's a romantic gesture or simply spending time together—can go a long way. Couples who understand each other's "Love Map" (the things that make each other feel special) tend to build stronger and healthier relationships. These conversations work best when done before frustrations build up, helping to avoid disappointment later.
Whether you’re into it or not, Valentine’s Day is an opportunity to share your love in a way that feels meaningful to both of you. It doesn’t have to revolve around heart-shaped candies or extravagant gestures—it’s about connecting in a joyful, authentic way.